24-year-old bride refuses to invite entitled sister's mother-in-law to her wedding, 30-year-old sister pulls her and her kids out of the retinue 3 weeks before the event, causing family feud: 'The wedding day isn't about the kids or you'

Author image for Emma Saven
Emma Saven
Jul 25, 2025 8:00 PM EDT

Some people make us wonder whether entitlement is genetic or something acquired over many years of being convinced that the world revolves around them. 

There are certain types of people who have an infuriating ability to make everything about themselves. A birthday, 'Well, I bought the cake and flowers!', a friend's anniversary, 'OMG, Tom and I have also been together for almost two months' (telling a couple celebrating their two years…), and in this case, even a wedding. 

After a bride realizes she does not want her sister's mother-in-law in attendance, tensions begin to spark between these siblings. Her sister was supposed to be a bridesmaid, her kids, the flower girls and ring bearers. She's been looking forward to her special day for months, which only comes around once in a lifetime (hopefully), but after her sister pulls out last minute at the blame of the neglect of her mother-in-law, their relationship starts to hit some choppy waters. 

Can this older sister put her wants aside to make her sister happy on her wedding day and avoid family drama, or will she make a scene and disrupt the most important day of her sister's life?

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  • Weddings are supposed to be a time of utter joy and celebration, with those closest to us by our sides. After months of time, effort, and planning, we would like to think that everything will run smoothly, with maybe just some smudged mascara after vows. 

    But when our family members start to believe that they have the right to make decisions for our special day, that is when a spanner gets thrown into the works, and instead of the formation of a wedding, we start to see more elements of a circus coming to life (and not the good kind!)

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    "She had also mentioned that taking two days off from work will cost her $600 and that I should pay her for missing out on work
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    The image does not depict the actual subjects of the story. Subjects are models.

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    AITA for not allowing my sisters MIL to come to my wedding?

    i (24f) am getting married in less than 3 weeks. My older sister (30f) was supposed to be my bridesmaid along with her kids
    via serutnevdasim_
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    (3f, 7M and 11M) as my flower girl and ring bearers. Her MIL has arrived to visit her husband (35M) so shes currently on vacation
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    here. Some more details, My mother (49F) and my sisters MIL do not get along, mostly because of my sisters husband. My
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    parents were never fond of him, because after he arrived here he never helped out with his kids, never worked, would always stay
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    in the room, and never contributed to household work. One day my mother decided to text the MIL to complain about
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    my sisters husband, which in the end didnt turn out good. Fast forward to now, my sister asked if her MIL could come and i said no.
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    1) I personally dont know her and 2) MIL and my mom dont get along and im not trying to have issues on my wedding day. We
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    had this conversations a couple of times, to where the last time she asked she said that her husband would stay home. I
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    thought the matter was all set. Turns out last Friday, she sends me a messages saying that her MIL deserves to see her grandkids
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    participate in the wedding, and if shes not going, then she is pulling out of the wedding, including the kids. I responded
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    Cheezburger Image 10533328384
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    The image does not depict the actual subjects of the story. Subjects are models.

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    back by saying "the wedding day isnt about the kids or you, its about me and my fiancee". She had also mentioned that taking 2
    via serutnevdasim_
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    days off from work (we both work in the same place) is gonna cost her $600 and that i should pay her for missing out on work. I
    via serutnevdasim_
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    asked her to be my bridesmaid last year in November, she couldve simply told me no at the time or we couldve had this
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    argument months ago, not 3 weeks before the wedding. so am i wrong for not allowing her MIL to come?
    via serutnevdasim_
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    Large Effective_812 NTA, tell your sister save it and you will do her the great favor of releasing her from the wedding. As you only want family and close friends there not a woman you no longer know. This includes your sister and her MIL. Enjoy your day and give them no thoughts.
    via Large_Effective_812
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    pegwins Personally, I'd say fine. Flower girls and ring bearers aren't mission critical.
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    OfluffytheOferocious NTA. She's not your mother in law. She doesn't have to be there at all.
    via 0fluffythe0ferocious
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    EmpressOfMyBackyard "Well, Sis, looks like you won't need to miss work after all."
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    Cindyf65 This is emotional blackmail. Let her walk
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    Altruistic-Bunny Do yourself a favor, get a new bridesmaid (or just have uneven numbers), you do not need flower girl or ring bearer. Let her step down. That is some new level of entitlement, she wants you to pay her and have her MIL.
    via Altruistic-Bunny
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    WrongCase7532 Nta and good for you for telling her no thanks, go ahead you and your kids are not center of attention at this wedding. Full stop.
    via WrongCase7532

Tags

nephews invitation family drama bride flowergirl bridesmaids dilemma cancelled Wedding Invitation Awkward askreddit niece reddit story family feud tension wedding mother in law sister cheezcake
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